Always spell check your first letter.
Always use spell checker. Letter with grammatical errors looks bad and sloppy. Show respect to the girl you are writing to and make sure your spelling is correct.
Always use spell checker. Letter with grammatical errors looks bad and sloppy. Show respect to the girl you are writing to and make sure your spelling is correct.
Don’t put your phone on the first letter. If you write this letter right she will give you her phone number soon. It’s always better when you are calling a girl first. Besides you don’t want your number to get to spammers.
Should you write to girls without a picture in their profile? It’s similar to browsing the small dating sites. Competition is not too tight. Chances to get an answer are high. A girl without a picture in her profile will receive less than a hundred letters from a major web site altogether. And even less if she posts on a minor site. So she will almost certainly find and read your letter. But will you want to go out with her when you get her picture? You don’t know yet.
Is it worth spending time browsing minor dating web site? It depends on how much time you are willing to spend on on-line dating. Most of the girls will post on the major web sites. So chances to find some one you like on the big site are big as well. But the competition is rather high also. So, if you feel like spending some extra time to explore minor dating sites – go for it. There are not as many girls over there to choose from but there are not as many guys who write them either. And sometimes you can find real gems on these small web sites.
User plain and simple language. Make your letter easy to read. Remember, she has hundreds of other e-mails to read. Make sure she will finish yours.
Don’t look like a really nice guy on your letter. Girls don’t like nice guys. They get bored with them. They like real men. Put in the letter something bad about yourself. Tell her how you’ve dropped your accounting job once, bought a chopper and down to Mexico for 2 month. Tell her about something wild you’ve done. And again don’t make it long. A couple of sentences are enough.
Don’t say puny fraises like “I don’t know if you are going to answer me…” or “I don’t think you will answer me but I decided to write you anyway…” It is some of the worst things to say. Don’t act like a looser. Girls like confident men. So be one.
Don’t ask her “What a girls like you doing on a dating web site?” It’s just a wrong question. Aren’t you glad a girl like this is posting on a dating web site? And aren’t you are doing the same? Remember, on-line dating is just an effective way to meet new people. So don’t ask why she is here. She is here with exactly the same reason as you – to meet some one.
Here is another trick I’ve used. When a new girls appears on the dating site, don’t send her a letter right away. Wait for a day or two. On the first day it’s too easy to get lost among the hundreds of other letters while on the 2nd or 3rd day it’s easier to get noticed. But don’t wait too long since she may stop checking her e-mails.
DON’T offer her an off-line date in the first letter. Chances for success are slim. Most girls will turn you down. Instead make her interested in you. Start a conversation.
Tell her about yourself. What you like, what you do for fun. Be an interesting person, girls hate boring guys. Among you interest mention something smart. Books for example. Girls like smart guys. Mention that you are playing sports, let her know your are in good shape. Tell her you like to travel, she may think you can take her with you on the next trip. But again - make it short and informative. Don’t put stories about your last trip to Hawaii or your Small League game. Not now.
Remember, women like successful men. It’s a rule. So be one at least in the letter. Don’t lie about yourself but instead just arrange true facts about your life in the most favorable way. I am not going to tell you how to do it. Not even will give an example. Everyone can be successful and look good. No matter who you are – car mechanic or an MBA student. In a couple of sentences show her that you are proud of what you are doing, you are good at what you are doing and you have great future in this field. It’s better to be a car mechanic, best in town, than a pathetic MBA with puny boring job. Regardless of your occupation every one can be looser too.
Make it easy for her to answer you. In the end of your letter ask her a question. If she decides to write you back – she won’t have to think hard what to tell you. You already asked. There are two types of questions you can ask in the first letter: general and specific. General questions are like these:
Make your letter personal. Make her to believe you are writing just for her. Girls hate to receive cliche letters. They want to receive a letter written just for them. So write one. Definitely user her name on the letter. Comment on what she wrote in her profile on the dating site. Say a complement. Be creative. Ask her questions about what wrote. For example, if she says she likes dancing ask her about her favorite style and ask if she’s giving private lessons. Let’s admit, we all use templates. But let’s do it a smart way. Customize your template for this particular girl, spend at least several minutes making your letter personal and interesting to read. It’s great if you have something in common. You traveled to same place, drive the same car or work in the same field. Tell her about it. And ask her a question about it. After that you will look more familiar to her then the rest of her correspondents. Ounce again, remember. She will get tons of template generated letters once she posts profile on the dating web site. Make your letter different.
Make your letter short. How many letters do you think an average girl gets when she posts her profile on the dating site? I checked - several hundreds the first day. If she has a really nice picture - several thousand. This number gradually goes down as tome goes, but it is still way more than she can possibly read. Your goal is to make your letter read and competition is tight. So start with the subject field. Your subject decides if she will read your letter at all. So make it good. I believe it must be shirt, friendly and different from the rest. What most people put in the subject?
Girls really hate it when they get the same letter twice. They want to believe every letter is unique and is written specially for them. So if you really like the girl - just write a new letter. And use different pictures too. It's worth the effort.
Make sure you NEVER write to same girl twice. Well... let me take this back. Make sure you never send THE SAME LETTER to same girl twice. It's a very typical situation when a girl is posting her profile again and again after some time period. This happened to me once. I wrote to a girl (and she had a killer picture too, I have no doubts she received hundreds if not thousands of letters) and she never answered to me. Some time later she posted her profile again. The picture and the words were different but I immediately recognized this cutie. I decided to write her again. But this time I came up with completely different letter. Different pictures too. I got a date with her.
Always attach pictures. They must be of good quality, decent (suitable for day time broadcast) and not too big. 50kb per picture is enough. What if she’s still using dial-up? Do use Photoshop to reduce the size of the pictures and for some moderate editing. Make sure your face can be seen clearly and there are no other people in sight. Yes, it’s really bad to send pictures that show someone else. What if she likes that person better than you? Just get a good shot of yourself and send it out.
*) Start your letter with greetings and some explanation of why you write her. Tell her that you’ve seen her profile on dating site. Tell her you really liked her pictures and the story. Tell her you couldn’t resist and decided to write her a letter. Tell a complement regarding her picture (more about complement later). Remember, you are writing to a total stranger so explain where you got her address and why you decided to write her. It’s always a good way to start a letter.
Talking about being creative… You can write? Offer her to write a story about herself. Or a fairy-tale. No kidding it works great! Ask her for some facts about herself and then promise her to send your creation. I know it’s hard. But it’s really worth the effort. I tried. Of cause this approach is good not for all girls. Try to sense her mood and then decide. But if you apply it to right girl you will be surprised with results.
Overall rule – make your letter short, friendly, informative and creative.
A short guide to online dating.
I was doing a lot of online dating. And I am good at it. I learned how make girls interested in me, how to start conversation with them and how to bring this internet affair off-line. In this blog I will share my experience with you. I want you to know everything that I’ve learned the hard way. My goal is to show you the most effective way to meet people in the Dating Website. My notes are mostly for the guys since they are based on my personal online dating experience. But I will certainly appreciate any comments from ladies if they find my blog interesting for them too.